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9 Reasons to Engage with the Enneagram



So, what exactly IS the purpose of digging into the Enneagram? Is it just a fad? Or could it possibly be one of the most impactful explorations of your life?


Here are nine reasons that drew me to study and apply the Enneagram. Before you ask, nope, they are not type related! Just nine good reasons why digging in beyond only knowing your number can be radically life-altering.


Reason 1: It gives us a new (and accurate) perspective of ourselves.


Honestly, this is where most of us stop, right? Thanks for the new perspective, but I don’t have time, it’s too uncomfortable, I’m happy where I’m at, etc, etc.


But what if – what if that new perspective was what we’ve been longing to see all along?

There’s a line in “The Drowsy Chaperone” (such a fun musical!) that has always cracked me up and then sobered me with it’s plain truth: “Sometimes a new perspective can change your point of view!”


I mean, obviously! But also, oh. Yeah.


Sometimes a new perspective can change our point of view of ourselves, our relationships, our work, our faith, our art, and life in general *just enough* to empower our voice, shift our narrative, and unleash our story. I know it did for me.


Q&A: How has engaging in learning more about yourself through working with the Enneagram influenced your life? What is an area of your life that you’d love to engage with from a new perspective?


Reason 2: It illuminates our blind spots.


Okay, so this one can hurt a bit. None of us actually *wants* to acknowledge that we have areas we ignore, repress, neglect, or are unaware of. That’s why they’re called “blind spots,” right?


But when we can’t see what we can’t see, we can’t grow wholeheartedly. We will keep hitting those same walls, stay in those same ruts, and encounter the same frustrations time and again.


I’ve heard so many stories of people throwing books across the room when they read their type. I was one of them. Those blind spots were so spot on and I wanted to return to my blissful blindness. The illumination ached.


And yet…


Opening my eyes wide changed everything.


We’re not really talking about “things to work on,” or “weaknesses,” or even “faults.” We’re talking about chronic patterns of mindset, automatic responses, habitual triggers, and autopilot/asleep living. We are often so blind to where we focus our attention, what our thoughts fixate on, and how we’re driven by some pretty core things that run the show.

It’s uncomfortable, yes, but it’s necessary if we want to shift the narrative to which we’ve been limiting ourselves and live the stories we were born for.


Q&A: How has engaging in learning more about your blind spots through working with the Enneagram influenced your life? What is an area of your life you feel needs some illumination?


Reason 3: It gives language to communicate effectively.


I’m convinced that most miscommunications in life are based on speaking with the fluency of our type and not translating the other’s language as well (or at all). It’s so easy to misunderstand words when there are fundamental differences in perspective, motivations, and values.


One of the greatest gifts of the Enneagram is in giving not only vocabulary, but also a nuanced language to understand ourselves and others. Now when we hear words tinged with justice and autonomy coming from an Eight, we don’t dismiss or discount them – we understand that these are central tenets of this person and to discredit that would be to push the person away. Now when we hear our friend express their distress with words around working harder, achieving more, and being the best, we recognize this as the automatic drive of Three defining their value by what they do and how admired they are for it, and we can love back to who they are without basing it in what they do.


The real blessing here is in being able to recognize this in the moment of communication – to have a thoughtful, honest conversation that allows for both types to be understood because they are rooted in a common language. I love working with couples for this reason – that look of recognition and relief when the two are able to crack what seemed like coded messages.


You don’t have to be an Enneagram expert to begin to understand this language, but studying good material, engaging in honest conversations, and listening to real people of each type will help you have that compassionate, effective communication we all hope to have – beyond stereotypes and assumptions.


Q&A: How has engaging in learning more about the language of the Enneagram influenced your life? What is an area of your life you feel needs some better communication?


Reason 4: It articulates all I’ve always known to be true but didn’t have words for.


How often have you felt truly known? By others? By yourself?


A wonder of the Enneagram I’ve heard recounted over and over again is that the it didn’t just provide communication tools (see above), it also helps to articulate the inner world so succinctly and with astounding precision. People find clarity on their thoughts, feelings, and actions in a way that is familiar, yet has been out of reach.


I often reach a point in sharing vulnerably where the logic and reasoning gets fuzzy, the feelings seems to choke my words, and I feel paralyzed in continuing any further – until the framework of my type structure comes into view and I can see clearly *why* I am stuck or frustrated or embarrassed AND I can actually put it into words.


Is it just me or do the right words help a ton??


Q&A: How has engaging in the work of the Enneagram helped you articulate your inner world? What is an area of your life you feel needs some help with articulation?


Reason 5: It’s based on motivations, not behaviors.


This is THE reason I was drawn to using the Enneagram as a tool in my life at all. If you hang around me at all and you ask me to just offhand type you or someone else, you know my answer: “Nope!” Why? Because the Enneagram is based on motivations, not behaviors, and you know what we tend to observe? Yup, you got it. Behaviors.


That’s the fascinating part of the Enneagram. Two or more types can habitually do the same things but for very different reasons. What the Enneagram gets at is the “Why” behind the “What” and that makes a HUGE difference. And since we aren’t in that inner world of others, we can really only type *ourselves* accurately – and honestly, even then, we may have to do a lot of inner work, study, and conversing in order to really uncover what our motivations actually are.


Often, we are completely unaware that there is something driving the autopilot of our lives. After all, they are called “unconscious” motivations for a reason! The more we become aware of it, the more we are able to catch it, consider it, and make a choice to live more freely and thoughtfully.


It’s uncomfortable work, but it’s oh so good and it changes everything.


Q&A: How has engaging in learning more about the motivations of the Enneagram influenced your life? How has noticing your unconscious motivations helped you?


Reason 6: It’s a short cut to the heart of things.


Getting to know, understand, and recognize our core motivations is a zip-line straight to what driving us. It helps us to by-pass the “why??” and get to the “ahh, *that’s* why.” And the more we recognize it, the more we can work with it.


This is the beauty of the Enneagram – helping us to get at what really matters, and fairly quickly at that.


Suddenly, that major blow up over something minor makes a lot of sense when traced back to a core desire. The inner tension and anxiety over making a simple choice can begin to be resolved when traced back to a core fear. That feeling of “not being myself” in certain situations occurs less frequently because the drive for fill-in-the-blank is caught, recognized, and worked on before the mask can be put in place.


We start to see where our thoughts, feelings, and actions are coming from deep inside and we begin to breathe more deeply, live more freely, and grow more fully.


Q&A: How has engaging in learning to see your motivations more quickly influenced your life? How have you grown in freedom by catching it before you act?


Reason 7: It provides a dynamic path of growth through awareness.


So often I hear people brush the Enneagram aside as “just another personality test. How could a personality test help me grow?” Such a good question!


Because the Enneagram is not “just another personality test” (in fact, I tend to steer folks away from Enneagram tests in general, but that’s a post for another day!). What I love about the Enneagram is that it provides a detailed, nuanced picture of how we tend to operate and why, AND detailed, nuanced DYNAMIC paths of growth and tools to get there.


And it all starts with awareness.


Awareness of what is driving us, what we focus on, how we stand in the world, how we communicate, what we fear, what we desire, how we handle conflict and disappointment, and oh so much more.


We often think we are pretty aware of all of that until we catch ourselves living on autopilot. It’s a revelation that happens a hundred times a day and each time we catch it, we have the opportunity to grow instead.


I’ve heard working with the Enneagram referred to as “accelerated growth” and “targeted sanctification.” I love both of those terms. Working with the Enneagram as a tool to uncover what’s underneath everything AND grow from there is highly efficient (which I value!), enlightening, and encouraging.


Q&A: How have you seen yourself grow since working with the Enneagram? What area of your life would you like to apply the dynamic growth paths of your type?


Reason 8: It generates compassion for other perspectives.


It sounds obvious, but when I first read through all nine types, I was struck with the revelation that we do not all operate from the same perspective.


Obvious, right?? And yet totally revolutionary.


I’m sure there are roughly 8 billion perspectives out there, and the Enneagram helps us make sense of so many viewpoints by discussing nine general outlooks with twenty-seven variations.


It can be easy to just stick with learning about your own type or the handful of types represented by the people you love. I love to encourage people to learn about the system as a whole, exploring all nine types and how they function in the world together.


Why?


Because there’s nothing quite like putting yourself in another type’s shoes to cultivate grace and compassion.


Suddenly the “WHY would they do that???” turns into “Ahhh, THAT’S why they did that.” It still might not make sense from your point of view, but you can begin to empathize with their type and have a bit more understanding that diffuses conflict and tension.


It’s also helpful to know that different types grow in different ways and the differences are important in helping us support each other’s growth process. What works for your type may be exactly opposite of what another type needs to focus on. The “you should’s” disappear and are replaced with patience and curiosity.


I love the mission of the school I certified with: The Narrative Enneagram – Transforming lives. Creating a more compassionate world.


Yes, please!


Q&A: How has learning about the Enneagram helped you see people differently? How do you approach differences in perspectives?


Reason 9: It broadens one’s view of the world.


As we grow through awareness, implement communication tools, and begin to see ourselves clearly and others with greater compassion, we encounter the profound experience of seeing the world expand. No longer are we locked into “the way it’s always been.” No longer is our view limited to our own perspective. No longer do we need to cram ourselves into a box, hoping labels and curated expectations will somehow make us more lovable and more known.


Rather, our hearts expand as we breathe fully and freely. Our minds expand as we release stress and tension. Our bodies expand as we embrace our instincts and allow what needs to come up to rise.


And limitations begin to melt away.


“I could never” turns to “I could try.”


“It’s just the way I am” changes to “There’s more to who I am.”


“They will always be like that” transforms into “I can love them no matter what.”


Why?


Because we’re not floundering anymore. No. No, we are equipped with a tool that can help us to explore and live our everyday, extraordinary lives with beautiful freedom.


And then, we take that freedom into the world and inspire others to live freely as well.


Q&A: How has engaging in Enneagram work impacted your view of the world and your part in it? What area of your life feels constricted and in need of freedom?




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